Anxious! Anxious! Anxious!

Seriously. My stitches say "no" but my legs say "twitch.....twitch."

No working out for at least 2 weeks?!

The doctor says 6. The doctor also said I couldn't take a bath for 6 weeks.

The doctor is a weenie-pants.

But......I need to exert SELF-CONTROL.

Which is hard. Especially when everyone around me seems to be on a really successful workout kick.

You know, getting in good workouts and losing weight.

And then there is schlumpy me. Sigh.

Getting on that scale is going to be hard: no excuse anymore about how heavy I am!

I worry that I won't have the motivation to work out anymore, once I have the opportunity.
Will I have lost the interest? The motivation? The habit?

But, I can't start too early either. I need to remember what Hills Are My Friends said about getting back to running too early: she said it set her back.
That she started back a bit too early is a testament to how hard it can be not to work out. She is super motivated but also waaaaaaaay more self-controlled than I am about NOT exercising when she might injure herself or worsen an already-existing injury.
What I am really scared of is that it won't be a struggle not to go running anymore.
That it will be easy and natural to do nothing.
That is scarier even than imagining no workouts looming in front of me for the near future.

I Am No Longer an HOV

I Just Look Like One.
(NB: this is NOT about running. If you just want to read about work-outs, stop reading.)

And feel like heck.

I agree with Hills Are My Friends: marathon versus childbirth? Childbirth is harder, hands down.

I'm sure it depends on how weenie you feel or how hard it is: some people I know swear the opposite is true.

But, take it from someone who has kept running in a race while puking and who has collapsed after a run from pushing too hard: it does not compare.

Now, the recovery. I still won't be working out or running for a while. We will see if I decide to post on other thoughts/crosswords/occupations.

I might also post some about the more hilarious parts of this whole experience that no one really tells you about. I say, teach these tidbits in sex ed and there might be a large surge in "abstinance" teens.
Heh.

Whew.

Well, he might look like a generic old man. But, he is my generic old man. Heh.

I Can't Wait

to be able to pull up my knee-high socks without grunting

to sleep on my stomach

to run without people getting mad at me

to run and actually pass someone

to not have to wear plus-sized clothing

for my thighs to no longer touch, again

to be able to eat fruits and vegetables with no consequences

to sit by myself and not have people staring at me

to go on a diet (now THAT'S a statement that has never come out of my mouth before!)

to put on pants without a major balancing act

for my feet not to swell

for people to stop asking me, with a patronizing smile, "how are you doing?"

to have my brain back, such as it is

to run again

It's amazing!

I finally caught up with the NYT crosswords. Of course, I DID skip some. But I am now in February and almost finished with Saturday's!

Hurray!

Now for doing the same with the rest of my life!

It Better Be Soon

I can't run.

Most of the time, I can't really sit up without needing to barf. So the pool and the exercise bike are the only elements of exercise I can really do. When I actually try to do them.

It's true. I've metamophasized into a 1st-class WHINER.


Whine.


Whine.


Whine.

I've been whining so much, I could barely fit in 50 minutes of swimming on Tuesday.

Will I lose all of my fitness? Probably.

Will that be the worst thing in the world?

I have to remember that the answer to this is "no."

Will I be able to eat vegetables again?

Yes. Eventually.

Right now, I'm eating basically an all-white diet. Sugar, ice cream products and white bread. Most other things don't go so well.

Sigh. The diabetes. It looms.

So who knows when I will post again. Maybe when I get less nauseous and more motivated.

And after I finally get my homework done!

I Even Let Her Touch My Feet

And my Toes.

I'm that desperate. And I have no idea what these magical "pressure points" are for encouraging things.

After all, nothing else is helping.

But, seriously, why would ANYONE want her feet touched?

A mystery to me.

Creativity

No running. Sigh. My doctor family would kill me.

Apparently, I am alone in thinking that traveling and running are both great ideas.

Stuck, then, with being semi-creative.

Friday, I walked to Trader Joe's. I'd never been to one with a wine and beer section! Sorry, Story Finder, but I was tempted by the bottles of wine for $3.99.

Saturday and Sunday, I biked. And stacked two woodpiles worth of wood. And cleaned 7 bathrooms. And seeded part of my parents' lawn. And squatted over paint buckets while filling them with sawdust and mulch, the better to dry the old paint out.

Nothing. Humph. Folk remedies are a lot of hooey.

Maybe if I had been able to persuade my father to let me split the wood, too.

Laying around in bed reading didn't work, either. And didn't do much for my studying.

So today was an aqua-jogging day.

Still nothing.

I am trying a massage, later. If that doesn't work, I'm just giving up. Maybe laziness and massive weight gain will help.

You never know.