This Walking Thing

Wasn't Bad at All.

Bundled up in layers against the snow - happy April 1st, everyone! - I trudged outside to perform my penance. Walking.

Actually, though, it was kinda fun! I really didn't expect that.

Some pangs were felt: being passed by joggers was tough.

But then, I just put them out of my mind. They weren't my competition. They didn't even exist!

Instead, I set my sights on every walker around - including those across the street, or those pushing baby strollers and sipping coffee.

I pity those poor, unsuspecting commuters, checking their watches and drinking their brews. Little did they know that their whole reality had changed.

They were, unbeknownst to them, Losers. Because I had passed them. Big time.

Yeah! You, in those high heels? I won't even start breathing hard. You, texting away? Ha!

Sigh. All those crushed hopes. All those empty worlds.

Just call me "The Stalker"

Ok. Maybe I should think of another name: that one has slightly creepy connotations......